An End to a Means

15.10.14 (Day 297)


I’ve been up for just over two hours, working. Yes, working again. On this:

It’s very much a work in progress, just the bare bones and there’s at least 2-3 days work to do on the website. We have a presence though. Now the never-ending task of SEO begins. When I ran limited companies, SEO was one of the many business processes I outsourced. My companies were mainly business outsourced processes too. That sector still has a place in the market and once the new venture is properly on it’s feet, there’ll be a lot of outsourcing to chefs, while I work on the actual company. They’ll just be using the name as I supply the infrastructure and it’s starting to look good. That’s what I was always good at in business and I’m coming back.

I can’t work for someone else. I can’t take orders from others (apart from customers). So I’m working for myself. Or rather building a business which I will work on and in. I have confidence that this will work, I’ve had tentative enquiries already and the messages of support are still coming in. For example:

“Really happy for you mate! Still read the blog. Well done!” Emma (Yes, that one).

“Hey Steve, I wish you all the very best with your new venture . . . despite circumstances, you just can’t keep a good man down. Keep going . . .” Gordon.

So I’m working my way back to doing what I used to: running (building) a business during the day, playing online poker (for real money) in the evenings and even finding time in my 18-hour day for a bit of reading. I’m still working through the Saturday Guardian and Sunday’s Observer and I picked up a book from CRI on Monday: The Mind’s Eye, by Oliver Sacks, the subject of the film Awakenings, starring Robert DeNiro and Robin Williams.

CRI went well and my key worker is the latest subscriber to the theory that I can become a social drinker and not have to totally abstain. Building the business is keeping me busy and therefore off of the drink. Engaging with CRI is a means to an end, in that it will hasten my path to Colebrook House.

Until then, I’m making the most of the facilities I have available at my half way house and getting as much as possible done while I have an internet connection. As always, I’m eternally grateful and indebted to my host family. I’m at home here but not making myself too at home. I hope I’m not taking the piss by availing of the facilities made available (and food) and I hope I’m paying my way in kind. These people are too polite too say if this isn’t the case, so I do as much as I can whilst trying to stay out of the way to the best of my ability. Again then, my gratitude will rest here online where it’s indelible and permanent.

The host family have provided me with a means to move on; they’ve supported and encouraged me in my new venture. I need to move on. I want to move on for their sakes but I shall miss them dearly.

But this is the start of the new beginning. A long time in coming but this is building a future for myself and the future wife.

The wife says she’ll wait and that she’ll be with me forever but the means must sadly come to an end soon.


I’ve been let loose in the kitchen to prepare lunch and dinner. Such is the level of help I get here in the safe house. I get to cook, experiment, photograph and post recipes and blog entries about food. I have test tasters and most of what I produce is served to an appreciative audience.

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